the day i lost me some voice

I am writing this at my home in Pasir Mas. Today is the Akikah ceremony of my brother's first child, and there is a lot of people (mostly relatives) in the house, coming to see the new baby and greet the new parents.

I'm a bit tired now, so I am going to write about the day I lost my voice, just one day before coming back home.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

It was a bright day, the last day of working before I get an early Golden Week Holiday and went home to Pasir Mas.

I was so excited that my morning boner is stronger and stiffer compared to the usual ones.

I mean I can't wait to work hard again, close as many cases before I go home with minimal job concerns.

I am pumped.

Arrived at the office 30 minutes earlier than I usually did.

The Chief of Department, who usually comes in 30 minutes earlier than everyone else is the only person at desk, so I went to greet him a good morning.

Smiling, I said:

..... !!!

Nothing comes out.

Then after a couple of tries, I managed to ' vomit out ' a very high pitched but in low volume, of a Ohayougozaimasu. ( means good morning in polite/formal Japanese )

I realized that something is really wrong here, but I just don't know what to do.

I went to my desk and did some preparations for some experiments that I plan to do that day.

Time passes by, and I was interrupted by the secretary with the phone:

Ali-San, there is a Mr. Xxx from Company X on line for you.

He said there is a trouble that he wants to complaint about.

Translation: some other people fucked up, but it is your job to clean it up.

Damn how am I able to turn shit into diamonds with this voice of mine?

Well, by screaming like a lonely priest when told that little boys are no longer available to them.

I screamed to my customers.

Then I screamed to my boss.

Then I screamed to vendors who was the source of the fuck-up, I screamed to protect the company.

I don't know why, but somehow the customer who seemed angry at first, turned into a yes-men, agreeing with all my suggestions on how to un-fuck the situation.

Didn't expect this to work well, but I somehow learned a new skill.

My balls grows larger, it is beautiful.

Then I go home, and start packing my bags.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Going to stop writing now, there is a huge women that I don't really recognize, wearing lots of bling2, that's coming towards me to ask me when am I going to get married.

This is one fuck-up I don't know how to handle.

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night before going home

i'm packing my bags.

i got 10 more hours before my flight.

i know i need to go to sleep, but i'm still not fully prepared.

not my bags.

but my moral and culture compass.

i'm not the same person that people used to remember me with.


mixed emotions; filled with excitement and anxiety.

i'm going to malaysia.

to pasir mas.


i'm going to a foreign place i call home.

recent updates: it's the 18th of April

it has been a very busy month for me.

as i learned and gained more work-experience, my superiors have been increasing my work load and making me make decisions all by my own.

this learning process takes a lot of time and effort, and i could feel myself improving after each mistake and right decisions that i chose. it took a lot of gut to get up after being thrown violently onto the hard floor, and each fall makes me stronger and wiser.

i just hope that i'm not working way over my capacity.

just a little over is enough.

as i get used to working hard, i realized that i have developed this tendency to enjoy my weekdays like never before.

last week was fucking crazy as hell, i didn't know that i'm capable of doing something so crazy.

man people here sure do know how to party.

of course, i can't just write about what i did last weekend; some kids read my blogs and actually took me for a role model.

anyways, i'll be in malaysia from april 28 to may 5.

can't wait to be re-united with family and friends; i hope people still remembers that i exists.

and oh, i just bought a new semi-double bed from rakuten at a very cheap price.

expecting more crazy shit to be experienced with the help of this one new furniture.

life goes on. i keep making money by trying to reduce damages originating from other people's fuck-ups.

when a big foreign company tried to fish me with money in exchange of taking a position i have no interest in, things sure is not so bad.

i'll work hard, and i'll play harder.

movie review for march 2010

i might be busy because of work, but i can never skip from watching movies. and writing reviews about it. i'm glad i still could be doing this. so here it goes:

Up In The Air –8.6
George Clooney returns with another interesting movie. The viewer might be fooled with his interesting job as the guy who fires people, but the main theme about loneliness, responsibility and search for happiness slips into the unconscious mind, making people think and reflect it on themselves. Fun and highly enjoyable movie, highly recommended.

Precious Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire – 8.4
Brilliant movie. Like any other straight male, I was disgusted by the ugliness of Precious and her mother; don’t be having your meals when you watch this because the first half of the movie is about showing how ugly these two people are. Then damn these two bring some serious performance especially the mother; so much hate, so much anger, so much frustration and sadness. Straight young males might be put off by the volume of ugly women in this movie, but you can always watch Japanese gravure image DVD right after to stabilize your brain. Great movie and highly recommended.

Sherlock Holmes – 8.3
Guy Ritchie has truly revolutionized Sherlock Holmes into this action-oriented smart-ass with distinctive character thanks to a remarkable performance by Robert Downey Jr. You cannot have a Sherlock Holmes movie without him making almost illogically accurate accusations and be cool about it. This movie has very little of that and opt for a more Hollywood action movie approach; lots of fighting and shit blown off in very cool ways. Great action movie and recommended for sure.

New Moon – 6.0
Although I haven’t read any of the novels, the first movie was not so bad; establishing characters and enticing interest on the story etc. The second movie though, is like any second movie in other movie series: just a set up for the third. No story, terrible dialogue and too much focus on Bella being sappy sad that would irk and bore anyone except teen-girls with hymen intact in their vaginas. Not terrible, but definitely bad.

2012 – 7.5
Shit got destroyed and the human race is fucked! This movie is awesome if you like destruction! Watch this if you don’t want to think and just want to watch things got blown off Hollywood style.

Zombieland – 8.0
A good zombie movie is very hard to come by these days, and Zombieland succeeded by combining humor and violence so well. I love me some exploding zombie brains! Recommended for zombie lovers. Like me!

A Prophet – 8.0
Realistic acting, believable story and originality made watching this 2 and a half hour French movie worth the time. A young Arab was thrown into the gangster underworld and politics when he entered the prison; his stories of reaching up the pyramid of power so interesting and intriguing. Recommended if you like French in your tea.

The Messenger – 7.3
I guess it was pretty easy to fish for emotions from characters whose job is to give the news about the death of a soldier to his/her family. People handle death with craziness and this creates drama; both to the messenger and the one at the receiving end. The Messenger is one slow but effectively moving movie. Not my cup of tea though.

Merantau – 7.0
This latest venture of Indonesian movie industry into martial arts movie making is something that I look forward to very much, and although it cannot rival the big guns of Hong Kong and Tony Jaa, Merantau is a pretty good effort. Some of the moves are not as clean and smart, but still entertaining nonetheless. Hope to see more effort from Iko Uwais!

Planet 51 – 6.5
Delivers pretty much what you expect from a 3D movie such as this: great animation, fun story and some positive messages for the kids. Not the best, but it was not so bad.

The Hangover – 7.8
A surprisingly fun movie to watch. A group of guys woke up in a Las Vegas hotel after a crazy night of bachelor partying, and not knowing what exactly happened. Funny movie, and crazy too. Don't forget to watch the credits. Funny shit.

Sympathy For Lady Vengence – 8.5
Not a direct sequel to the excellent Sympathy For Mr Vengence, but still retains the ‘shock factor’ the former movie excels in. This movie is filled with shocking scenes depicting ordinary people with inordinate amount of wrath for revenge. Calling it a violent Korean movie is an understatement. This movie is violent and it will shock some; me likey. Highly recommended.

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus – 7.0
The imaginarium of Terry Gilliam would be more precise. The director has very imaginative minds and although the movie lack story and great dialogues, the crazy visuals of Terry Gilliam was fantastic as ever; and it was nice to be lost in it, even for a moment.

Dari Jemapoh Ke Manchestee – 6.0
Bad, bad Malay movie. I couldn’t finish watching it at all.

Tears For You (涙そうそう) – 7.0
Okiwanan-themed movie taking inspiration from the hit song Nadasousou. A decent drama about a simple guy trying to keep his promise to keep his younger sister safe. It has all the basic accense of a typical Japanese drama. Story was very easy to folloe. Nagawasa Masami still has not improved her acting abilities, still stuck in the ‘cute innocent girl’ stereotype.

Anticrist – 6.0
The psychologist’s wife’s a crazy bitch. They have sex in slow motion. I don’t understand the movie at all.

A Serious Man – 7.0
A Serious Man is boring… and I’m not even anti-semite!

This Is It – 7.0
Watch this if you like music. A farewell to the music genius of our generation.

武士の一分 – 7.4
Probably the best Kimura Takuya film out there. Who said he sucked in acting? Kimutaku played a very distinctive, strong character; a loyal samurai who struggles with pride and family when a ‘food testing for the leader’ went bad and stole his precious sights. Recommended for samurai-drama lovers.

Hello Schoolgirl – 6.8
This Korean ‘romantic’ has no interesting story but the female casts were cute enough to keep me awake for the whole movie. Ok I lied, I did slept during the second half but it did not hinder on the experience because there was not so much to begin with.

Carlito’s Way – 7.8
Brian De Palma, Al Pacino and Sean Penn. Classic. Watch this if you like old school mafia movies.

Campaign – 7.5
A look into Japan’s politics through the almost pathetic life of a starting politician. Still couldn’t believe that this is reality.

Sorority Row – 5.0
Sluts got killed in horrible ways by someone they know!

Killer Movie – 4.0
Just another slasher movie.

Sadistic And Masochistic – 4.5
A documentary about one famous Japanese S&M movie director. Don’t now why I wanted to watch this.

before throwing myself onto the futon in exhaustion

just got out of the ofuro.

today i used the lavander scent to put some variety on my ofuro routine.

felt like my souls have been lifted one inch from my head.

just enough for me to know that i'm still in the world of reality.

bones were floating and i breathe floras from Hokkaido.

* * *

tahniah to my little sister Amirah.

you earned that 9A's in SPM.

you said that you were able to achieve this thanks to prayers from me and other family members.

well, you are wrong.

you did it yourself; with the help of your teachers and study friends.

congratulations again.

pursue that medical career that you always dreamt about.

* * *

today was probably the hardest day at work.

and also the most that i learned from this career.

i learned to have more confidence in a decision that was based on findings from my own work of investigation and experiments.

i learned how to prepare defenses against attacks from smart customers.

although i lost this one battle, i gained something else.

something else that might be better.

i'm starting to love tough customers who knows what they're talking about.

bring it on!