xmas eve

the television is telling the whole of japan that it is christmas eve.

when i get ready to get off from work today, one of my senpai asked me:

"it is christmas eve. what do you do on christmas eve?"

i don't want to tell him the truth, but i have to.

"well, i am not a christian, so christmas is not something that i felt attached to. so i don't plan for anything special this christmas eve. (maybe i wrote a thing or two about it in my blog)"

"japan is not a christian nation, but we kinda celebrate it in some ways. what do think about this?"

"that is what so interesting and mysterious about japan... or maybe this just shows how much influence the japanese mass media have on the ordinary japanese citizen."

I said my goodbyes and left with a feeling that I might have said something rude.

キリスト教徒じゃねーからクリスマスを祝うんじゃねーよ　という誤解があるかも。

そういうつもりで、皮肉的に言った　のではない。

なぜなら、クリスマスなって、キリスト教にまったく深い関係なんか。。。ない。

これを細かく説明する暇はない。

それに、ややこしい事になるから、止めとく。

In Japan, Christmas is portrayed like a major event, but the truth is that it is nothing more than an empty Japanese misunderstanding of a foreign culture.

Sponsored by Coca-Cola, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Japanese Cake Manufacturers and Love Hotels.

And I like it.

I like the illuminated lights.

It may have no meaning, but I like the scenery anyways.

This is also a great time to shop, as everywhere is Xmas Sale.


lastly, i would like to wish a warm merry christmas to all those celebrating; christian or not.

※ 'coz christmas have nothing to do with christianity anyways. ※

i hope you have a great time with your beloved ones.

tak nak balik berkhidmat untuk negara ke?

aku ditaja JPA untuk belajar di Jepun selama 6 tahun.

april 2003 - march 2009.

setahun buat bahasa jepun, 3 tahun buat diploma pastu lagi 2 tahun buat degree.

kalo ikut rate sekarang, biasiswa bulanan yang aku dapat adalah lebih kurang rm4800.

(100yen=rm3.7)

rm4800 darab 12 bulan darab 6 tahun = rm345,600.

banyak tu.

tu tak kira duit yuran pengajian + elaun buku la, elaun pindah, elaun kesihatan etc.

kalo campur sumer2, ada kot cecah setengah juta.

" setengah juta? banyak tu beb, but still, ko masih nak stay kerja kat jepun, tak nak balik berkhidmat untuk negara, untuk rakyat ke? "

ke sudah lupa diri?

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dulu aku banyak kali terbaca berita pasal student overseas tajaan kerajaan yang lepas graduate, tak nak balik mesia, langgar contract dengan terus sambung kerja kat oversea, pastu tak bayar plak tuh duit pinjaman.

kerajaan taja mahal2 supaya nanti dia bole balik untuk berkhidmat untuk rakyat.

tapi balasan nya, dia lari entah ke mana, demi kepentingan diri sendiri.

taufiq ali, kamu macam mana?

KLIK UNTUK BACA SETERUSNYA !!

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kontrak aku dengan JPA lebih kurang mcam nih:

aku belajar sampai dapat degree dalam kejuruteraan mekanikal kat universiti nasional jepun, dan lepas graduate, pihak kerajaan berhak memanggil aku untuk bekerja dengan mana2 badan kerajaan yg memerlukan. jika aku tidak berjaya untuk menghabiskan pengajian dalam masa yg ditetapkan @ menolak tawaran pekerjaan daripada kerajaan selepas graduate, aku bole dikenakan saman dan perlu membayar balik duit ganti rugi (duit biasiswa) kepada pihak JPA.

seterusnya, selepas cukup setahun daripada tarikh aku graduate secara rasmi, tetapi pihak JPA masih belum memanggil aku untuk berkhidmat dengan mana2 badan kerajaan, maka aku bebas daripada kontrak dengan JPA tersebut.

aku tak perlu kerja dengan kerajaan dan aku tak perlu bayar apa2 pun jika perkara diatas berlaku.

sebelum aku masuk company aku skang, aku dikehendaki oleh pihak embassy untuk menghantar satu surat ajaib.

surat perlepasan kontrak namanya.

kuasa surat tersebut adalah untuk memendekkan masa menunggu untuk ditawarkan untuk bekerja dengan kerajaan, daripada 1 tahun kepada 0 hari.

0 minit, 0 saat.

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jadi legally, aku tak perlu punbalik untuk bekerja di malaysia.

tapi aku tetap rasa yang aku perlu berkhidmat untuk negara.

kalau tidak, buat apa kerajaan habiskan setengah juta; cuma untuk lahirkan seorang jurutera yang akhirnya bekerja dengan syarikat bukan kerajaan?

bukan kah pelik lagi aneh sekali program tajaan luar negara yang aku sertai nih?

pelik, memang pelik.

aneh, memang aneh; kalau kita tidak tahu objective utama buah fikiran tun mahathir nih.

anda pernah dengar pasal dasar pandang ke timur tak?

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seperti ramai muda mudi malaysia zaman sekarang, tun mahathir pun suka sangat2 dengan jepun dan rakyat2 nya.

muda mudi suka anime dan manga, tun mahathir suka dengan japanese work ethics.

muda mudi suka j-pop dan j-dorama, tun mahathir suka dengan japanese customer service.

muda mudi suka mihiro, tsubomi, maria ozawa, yoshizawa akiho, yui komine, sakurako, riko tachibana, takako kitahara, tina yuzuki, hiyori shiraishi, nao yoshizaki, ran monbu, erica kurisu, kaede matsushima, serina hayakawa, yuka ozawa, rio hamazaki, sakura sakurada, jun seto, kazama yumi, ayukawa nao, asami yuma, hatsune minori, natsume nana, mizaki mao, nakano mina, imano yume... (kalo korang tahu lebih daripada 5 nama di sini, maka korang memang kena kurang kan tengok japanese AV... seriously dude ;p)

tun mahathir suka japanese punctuality, precision and passion for detail.

tun mahathir suka + kagum sesangat dengan orang jepun nih, sampai dia mahu makin ramai orang malaysia yang jadi macam orang jepun.

cara untuk menjadikan impian tun mahathir itu satu kejayaan adalah dengan menghantar student2 malaysia untuk belajar di universiti2 di jepun, dengan harapan bila mereka pulang nanti, akan terbentuk satu komuniti malaysian yang mempunyai ciri2 kejepunan, dan komuniti ini diharap dapat mempengaruhi rakyat lain untuk mencontohi sifat2 kejepunan yang tun mahathir suka sangat tu.

kesimpulan nya, tun mahathir mahu supaya rakyat malaysia pon mampu bertukar jadi ultraman.

memang cantik sekali rancangan itu.

tapi seperti mana2 rancangan manusia, ianya tidak sempurna.

[note: aku dapat explanation nih daripada bekas setiausaha peribadi tun mahathir ketika kami tengah minum kopi kat doutour selepas menunaikan solat jumaat di sebuah surau dekat dengan stesen shin-okubo. of course la aku tambah perisa sket...]

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rancangan ini kurang sempurna kerana japanese work ethics tidak di ajar di universiti2 nasional jepun, tetapi hanya bole dipelajari apabila seseorang itu bekerja dengan syarikat jepun di negara jepun.

so kawan2 sekalian.

macam ini lah cara nya aku berfikir.

macam mana nak berkhidmat untuk negara.

adalah dengan menimba ilmu dan pengalaman bekerja dengan orang jepun, dalam syarikat jepun kat jepun.

sebab tu lah aku sengaja pilih syarikat yang tidak ada seorang pun pekerja malaysia.

aku masuk sorang2, dan hopefully aku bole buat kawan baru dan dapat memahami culture jepun sepenuhnya.

walaupon memang aku tidak nafikan, yang bekerja kat sini bukan lah mudah, tetapi aku kuatkan juga semangat.

bila aku dah rasa macam dah ada pengalaman, baru aku rasa aku boleh balik, dan tolong jump start project2 kat malaysia pula.

aku harap aku dapat ilmu dan pengalaman yang membolehkan aku mempengaruhi orang malaysia jadi ultramen, satria baja hitam, flashman, 5 ranger etc.

aku harap aku dapat menjadi 'jambatan' yang menghubungi malaysia dan jepun.

alamak, cakap besar plak aku nih.

tapi, itu lah motivasi aku buat masa nih.

motivasi ku adalah untuk memberi sumbangan kepada negara.

setengah juta punya budi, kena balas jugak walaupon orang tak minta.

[nota aneh: aku tak pernah lak dengar mana2 senior aku yang end up kerja dengan kerajaan. tidak ada seorang pon. majoriti yang kerja kat malaysia pon, masuk syarikat jepun juga. perkara aneh ini sebenarnya tidak lah aneh sangat. kerajaan nak pakai ke jurutera yang reti cakap bahasa jepun?]

first ski experience! スキー初体験！

It’s almost 5 years since I first set foot on Japanese soil, and before last week, I’ve never skied before! So last week, about 10 days ago, I joined the university’s ski tour to ski for the first time in my life! I’ve snowboarded before (like 2-4 times a year) but never tried ski so was very excited and looking forward to this trip.

The trip was targeted to foreign student who had no ski experience whatsoever so it was the perfect trip for me.


It was a two hours trip from the university to the tazawako ski sports facility, the place where we’re going to stay and consume food. Talking about food… let’s just say that it was not the best they could offer.


After taking our first meal, I went to the powder room. To take a shit. And then I was surprised with the toilets they have in the facility. Of course it had the normal warmed seat, jet-water and all; the weirdest thing about the toilet, as seen on the picture above is that it has a button in which if you push it, the toilet seat would make an artificial flushing sound. At first I really don’t understand why the genius Japanese toilet makers would create such functions. Then I used my knowledge of Japanese culture and ways of thinking to solve this mystery.

Let me explain it to you in detail here. See, the Japanese are very polite and don’t want to cause you any unpleasant feelings. Remember this mentality. Then I would like you to imagine yourself shitting a huge pile of shit one day, and the toilet cubicle at both sides are also occupied with people who probably would shit a huge pile of shit too. If you would shit a huge, long, hard human faeces and drop it into the toilet, it would surely make a loud splash sound, a ‘plup’ sound, whatever. This distinct sound is quite embarrassing; so if you are a true Japanese, you would flush the water in just milliseconds before the huge, long, hard shit starts coming out of the hole of you arse and touching the water below. Are you following me? The sound of the flushing water would sort of ‘cover’ the sound of your huge, long, hard shit dropping into the toilet hole. People were doing it since the introduction of western toilets, I guess.

But with the rise of awareness to save water to help with the global warming, this practice seemed very unreasonable because you are wasting water. If you used this method, you would have to flush two times! Oh what a waste! So the brilliant guys at the toilet companies made a remarkable invention: put a button that actives the sound of flushing water! Now, no matter how big, how long and how hard you shit is, you will never have to waste water to cover the sound of your humongous shit dropping into the water. If you felt like the tip of your long, hard shit is just about to come out of your arsehole, just push the button and you are safe from the embarrassment of the sound of your own shit. Man, this kind of invention made me love the Japanese more!

I think even if you’re shitting messy; I mean like diarrhoea-kind of messiness, you could also use the button to cover the sound of shit spraying out of your butt.


Enough about the toilet already! After having some quality time at the powder room, we were told to strap on our ski gear because we’re taking our first ski lesson! Then we were separated into groups; with my groups consisting of 2 malaysians and 3 koreans. The 5 of us had not skied before so everyone looked like a idiot trying to balance themselves for the first time while slowly trying to learn how to break and turn. It was a great lesson and I think I’ve picked it up quite fast, unlike when I first learned how to snowboard. Now I know, snowboarding is a lot harder than skiing.


Skied for 3 hours and that’s enough for the day. I was quite tired after the lesson so I ate like a the fat kid on tv. Then later into the night, they had arranged a little ‘japanese winter’ event for us. First, we were tasked to draw/spray images onto these blocks of flatten snow. We were tasked to draw an image with the theme: Japanese Spring. it took us like 30 minutes and honestly, it was one of the ugliest drawings on a flattened snow that I have ever seen in my entire life. I think our group is kinda retarded. Then I looked at the drawings of the other teams. Thank GOD, they’re far worse.


Then we were tasked to dig holes on walls of pressured snow; holes big enough to fit a candle. Then we put candles into those holes and light it up. The end result is quite amazing, considering how retarded we are. Everyone said it was pretty. I was saying lets get inside I’m freezing my arse out here. Before going to bed, I went into the ofuro (hot spring) to get myself hot and went to sleep like a big baby. Ok, a gorilla baby.

The next morning, I went to the ofuro again; it was awesome! I really like hot springs, it makes your body warm and relaxed. The only negative thing about it is that you have to be fully naked to be able to go inside. I am quite shy when it comes to showing my own dick to strangers, so I always cover my little brother with a small towel, baring my arse for all to see of course.
You see, being a foreigner and also shy to show your penis to the public, it was quite hard. You want to know why? Well, it’s because the Japanese were also very curious people. They want to know. How big/small is the dick of a foreigner? I once went into a traditional hot spring in Nagano with a Nigerian friend, and everyone in the place was looking at the African guy. The Nigerian is not like me; he is not afraid to show his penis to the public. And I think I know why. If an innocent Japanese school girl accidentally saw his penis, she would run away because she might think that she had seen an amazon anaconda. You got the picture. If that guy chooses to work in the Japanese adult entertainment industry as a porn star, I’m sure he’s going to the very top. Yeah.

Enough with huge dicks and ofuro; the next morning, we went out again for the second time. This time, it’s not training anymore; we’re going to get on the lift so that we could start skiing from the top of the mountain. Although I’ve done this many times before, having ski gear at your feet instead of a snowboard does made the experience fresh. There was a slight rush of fear while I was going up the hills because the cable lift were constantly shaking up and down, left to right. I looked down and thought: man if I fall down, I might as well zip down and show my freezing penis to the whole world because I won’t survive the fall.

The moment of truth has cometh upon me. Everyone was on the top of the hill and was waiting to go down. This is the time to use those braking and turning techniques that we learned and practiced yesterday! One by one, the foreign student goes down. A lot of them fell down; one hit a tree and only a few stays standing on their feet. I was glad my training paid off!

The sense of speed rushing onto my face boils me excited, so I went up again to do it all over again. It was fun. After a couple of hours of skiing, the ski instructors told us to go down for the last time because we don’t have anymore time.


Then the inevitable group photo time comes. We took lots of photos, congratulate each other for a small achievement and went back to our staying place for the last lunch and to prepare to go home.

All in all, it was a great weekend. This is what I call a weekend well spent! I never thought that skiing was this fun! But I have to be honest, snowboarding is way cooler, so I ain’t skiing anymore yahoo !!! I want to snowboard !!!

Namahage Matsuri 2008

I went to a Japanese matsuri (festival) in Oga, Akita last Saturday. The festival is called Namahage Matsuri, and were usually held at the beginning of a new year. I don’t really have a full understanding of the festival, but from what I can decipher from my visit to the namahage museum, namahage are japanese demons/ogres that came down from the mountains to search for ‘bad’ children and to wish the farmers good luck and prosperity. And no, they don’t rape those bad children; they just scare the shit out of them.

I went with the university tour program and the first place we stopped is at the namahage museum I mentioned before. The museum is packed with namahage stuff. They even sell hello kitty namahage keitai (cellphone) straps! I also got to try the namahage costume myself!

Then we went to this fancy onsen (hotspring) hotel to eat lunch. We had seafood nabe, smoked salmon, some other stuff and of course rice. The food is definitely nice! After filling up some energy into our bodies, we went back to the bus and straight to the namagahe festival!

The festival was held in the middle of the jungle, beside a shito shrine. There were a lot of people that mobility is limited and I can’t really take any good picture of the damned namagahe because dumb people were always blocking my view.

First, the people posing as namahage did some shito ritual shit that I don’t understand, and then they went up a small stage, dancing and playing the Japanese taiko (big drums). After that, they light up some torch and went uphill to do another ritual shit symbolising the return of the namahage to the mountains, and then they came back down to mingle with the humans downhill. At this point, it’s a fucking chaos with everybody wanting to take pictures and have the change to grab some of the stray the namahage guys were wearing, because it was believed that if you got some of that stray, you’d have a prosperous life the whole year. Everybody knows that it is utter bullshit but that does not stop the girl from the picture above to be super excited that she caught several long straw of garbage.

There was a lot of smoke from the praying and firewood, so I was coughing all night because I’m allergic to smoke. It was not very nice because soon I was feeling very dizzy and sick from the damned smoke. Worse, there were also a lot of greasy old bastards who smoked cigarette like it’s the end of the world tomorrow. Damn, why are people so dumb to suck on such smelly, disgusting smoke?

All in all, it was not a bad festival. I was just a bit disappointed that I couldn’t see more of the festival because there were too much people blocking my view.

i'm a japanese demon for 30 seconds

i'm a japanese demon for 30 seconds because if it's longer than that, it could get very itchy. this is the costume for a famous japanese demon, namahage. it's like santa clause japanese version, and i'm not talking about the red coca cola santa clause that marketing people used to encourage people to spend more than they could afford just for the sake of the spirit of holiday.

rice-cake making with kindergarten kids!

Another cultural exchange program today with a slight difference; it’s with Japanese kindergarten kids. And we’re making rice-cake together! These kids are 5-6 years old so I’m very excited because Japanese kids are the cutest! I used to join a cultural exchange program with primary school kids (around 10-11 years old) and it was fun too, except they’re already grown up a bit making them little shy with strangers.

We could hear voices of children laughing and screaming when we arrived at the main entrance of the kindergarten. It’s a very big, clean and well organized, happy place for children. Then we were brought to the main hall to be introduced to the children. After that, one country after another, we were called to be in front of all the kids to show them the national flag and answer some questions about our country. Unfortunately for the Russians, the teachers put up the wrong Russian flag (the red army flag). Worse for the English, the teachers forgot to put up their flag. What a shame; and even though there were no Brazilian with us, they put up their flag also. So this teaches the children that even kindergarten teachers make mistakes, their human! Not a big deal at all.

Then we were asked to teach the kids about how animals sounded in our country. Like in the U.S., chicken would make a ‘cook-a-doodle-do’ sound while in Japan they sounded like this: ‘koke-kokkou’. Cats in japan: ‘nya’ while in china it’s ‘miau’, like everybody else. It’s very interesting to discover that people from different country interprets the sound of animals differently. Dogs in U.S. made a ‘bow wow’ sound while in Japan it’s just ‘wan wan’. In Korea its ‘kong kong’ while in England it’s ‘wuff wuff’. What about Malaysia? I don’t know, so I made it all up. When the ‘animal sound’ corner was over, this American girl came up to me and said “out of all the sounds, the Malaysian version is the funniest!!!”.

After that was over, we enter the main event: rice-cake making! What we do is that we use this long, heavy wooden hammer to beat the mochi rice until it becomes sticky and mochi-like. Of course we do it with the children like in the video below.

When the mochi (rice-cake) was done, it’s time to eat! They made 3 variations of mochi: soy souce, red bean and another one where it was covered with a mysterious powder. I hope it’s not drugs.

I joined the melon group (groups were divided by fruit names) to eat my mochi while chatting with the children. The girl sitting next to me was the cutest thing and she really has some interesting things to say. I did not expect much when talking to a 5 year old but she shocked me when suddenly she said that she would snap the neck of anyone who would bother her and leave the poor bastard to die. I told her to stop talking like that and use more polite Japanese because she was using foul language. She asked why, so I told her that she might hurt people’s feelings and I asked her to image what would she felt if someone else does the same thing. She told me she would stuck a long nail into the forehead of the kid who would do that to her. And this is with the presence of the founder of the kindergarten; and he did not say a word. The founder (he’s 91 years old) pretended like he does not hear a thing.

That really shocked me. How could they let these 5 year olds to say such violent things? What’s more bothering is that how can a 5 year old even think about killing other people? She is the cutest thing ever but she says the worst. Of course, this incident does not represent the majority of Japanese kids; not every Japanese kid is going to grow up to be psychopath, but this must be a sign of something that is very wrong about the education for children here.

で、それだけじゃない。「お前、ブス！」と超可愛い５歳の子供に言われたら、どう思います？悲しかったり、切なかったりして、頭を抱えることしか出来なくて、本当にショック。

Or maybe it’s just a joke? She was smiling and laughing when she said it; but do normal 5 year old jokes about killing people? Or maybe it’s because of me? I’m definitely a very bad influence to small children because I have turned a cute girl into a psychopathic child. Or maybe I’m just exaggerating this issue.

Then came the time to say goodbye. I rub the head of the psychopathic girl, hoping she did not end up killing any of her teachers or friends in the kindergarten because blood, gut and violence does not fit this happy place, at all. What am I thinking; she is going to be fine. She won’t kill anyone.

It was snowing heavily outside and I (with a Korean and a Mongolian student) took the taxi home. We talked about global warming and the future of alternative energy to counter that problem. But I’m still a bit worried about that kid.

--

of mini towel, panties and spinach

wow it's been a whole week without any new post. it's not that it matters but, you know. just saying stuff. i'm trying to make an opening here. which is kinda boring. yeah. em.....

so i'm going to write about what has happened recently. to start off, today i got a ' new year gift ' from the national health insurance for being healthy the whole year and not using my insurance rights. so to prize me for not using their service the whole year, they sent me a set of small hand towels and a couple of bionic soups that are environmental friendly. merry. before opening the package i was a bit skeptical. did they sent me a box of anthrax because i forget to pay them last year? was it going to be a box full of midget ninjas trying to act cute upfront but when i'm looking back, slits my throat and pulls my heart out? those little assassins! but no, i got an orange hand towel. nice. it's fluffy. i kinda like fluffy things. and mini-towels.

last night i experienced something new. i went to a 'go-kon' (合コン) with my classmates, three of them to be exact. to those who doesn't know, go-kon is a group blind date in japan and it's famous with young people trying to find a new boyfriend/girlfriend. it's usually done in a small group of people consisting of a balanced proportion of boys and girls. in case of the go-kon that i participated last night, it's 4 boys and 4 girls. and yeah, all 4 of the girls are 3rd year high school girls. firstly, i would like to clear everything up. i agreed to participate just to help my perverted classmate, murasawa to fill up the 4 boys quota. my intentions that night was NOT to find a japanese girl friend, ok? i'm just trying to help a friend and while doing that, i could have a hands-on experience with one particular japanese culture. i have enough problems and rainbow six vegas to make me look like i'm busy and occupied.

but minutes before we the 4 boys meet the 4 girls, i kinda thought this to myself: yeah it's ok if you're not doing this blind date seriously but what if all 4 of those girls, even one of them, are like, super cute and absolutely full of 'genki'ness? what if they're hot, kawaii, innocent high school girls that just wanted to ' try it ' with a foreigner like what i have read on blogs of a few and many single foreigners in japan? i mean, you have to be a dumb fool if you ignore that. suddenly i'm getting excited and i started to hope for those girls to be cuter than ayase haruka and hasegawa kyoko? what if they're this what if they're that. i learned the first rule of go-kon. NEVER. i repeat. NEVER put your hopes high. yeah we met the 4 girls right. and sadly (although i'm not supposed to be, remember i'm only filling up the quota? stupid me) all of the girls are below average. i don't believe they're real high school girls. one girl even looks like a worker at a canteen or a food court, you know what i mean? those who looks like 'obasan'.

but it was not bad. we had some good conversations about a lot of things. looks like all 4 are very close friends. all of them want to be an elementary school or a kindergarten teacher. that's nice but i don't know about the other 3, but i'm SURE that obasan would end up in a canteen serving food. NO DOUBT ABOUT IT. out of all 4, there is one girl that i would consider OK, with a flash of genki and kawaii essence in her. i don't know why, but there are a lot of young japanese girls that has an uneven set of teeth, including her. lets call her tootsie. she is the most interesting of them all, but i'm not saying that i'm interested in her. but my friend murasawa and kawajiri seems to like this girl, but they're a bit shy. kawaii ne.

so although it's merely 5 ℃ outside, tootsie wears a short mini skirt with high heels. if i was her i would surely have frozen my vagina in the first 30 minutes. got her nails done with some diamond-like thingy stuck on it and all sort of weird japanezy trend going on, i don't really understand. i have a slight amazement with what these girls could endure just for fashion and looking good. hot or cold, mini skirt forever policy is a very hard policy for them but what can be done, japanese men like to see some legs i guess. but the no 1 thing that japanese men like is none other than a big, huge, eye popping set of hooters. stupid peer pressure.

so we went to a nice japanese style restaurant where the tables are brought close to the floor but you can put your feet under the table because there were feet space dug from the floor beneath the table. so you can put your feet below or just sit on the floor. i don't really know why, but tootsie sometimes chooses to move around trying to change her sitting positions. and yeah, although with the poor lighting condition, i unintentionally saw her panties when she did that. i swear it's just coincidence. call it luck or total misfortune, i didn't mean it. it's white with some fruit images on it. strawberry, banana, pineapple, grapes and maybe some guava, i don't really see it clearly. i felt so much guilt. i felt guilty as o.j. simpson. and what's worse, she noticed that i saw it. so she asked me with a big smiling blushy face: " you saw my panties right?". i got shot in the head at that time. so i horribly and desperately tried to explain to her that i didn't mean to look at it, it's just my good reflex skills at noticing something good to look at; and i was bestowed with the marvelous skill at the age of 7. i'll talk about that later, IF i remember to write about it. i don't mean it's good to look at, it's just, you know.... she smiled back and said " it's ok. it's my fault actually, i should be more careful." and being careful is not what tootsie is good at. i started to believe that she's doing those movements on purpose. i don't really mind if a lady volunteered to show me their lovely panties, but she's still an underage school girl and i really feel weird about it. to think about it, why the hell did i agreed to participate in a go-kon with a bunch of japanese high school girls in the first place? damn, i'm a BAD person. or maybe i just have too many perverted japanese friends, like murasawa.

so tootsie wants to be a kindergarten teacher right? so from out of nowhere she forced me to listen to a children story about a family of happy fingers, that she wrote herself. the idea is simple. the thumb finger is the father, index the mother, middle the brother, ring the little sister and pinky the little brother. so little sister is jealous of little brother because every one in the family closes their eyes on every shit the little bastard do; but when ever SHE did something wrong, she got scolded. i'm not really paying attention because it's RIDICULOUS !!! even for a children's story !!! then we also played some simple children's game, some of if i'm familiar with and some of it are totally new. it was not bad at all.

the other 3 girls, i really have nothing much to say. obasan is like an obasan. she talks too fast and were using far too much touhoku accent, i don't really understand what she's trying to tell me. another girl is just too shy to talk. i gave her one sentence of question/conversation, she answered it with another sentence of conversation. and all that we talked is about the vegetable meal (spinach mixed with goma) we had in front of us. she is so small and so short. her height is just 140cm! i'm sure if i kick her HARD enough, i can make her fly 50meters away. the last girl is the most normal one. quite talkative, dresses politely and she even knows where malaysia is! everyone else have no idea where malaysia is located, but when i said it's the country between singapore and thailand, they give me this blank look telling me this: where the hell is thailand and singapore? so i ended up drawing the whole map of asia starting from japan on the dining tissue. i think japanese people, especially the young ones should really take more interest in other foreign country (especially asian), not just usa. these people should stop being such fucking ignorant idiots!

after about 4 hours of a bad, crazy and boring go-kon, we decided to end the event by exchanging our email addresses. i only exchanged my email address with tootsie and the normal girl and i had no time to ask the shy girl and obasan for theirs because i got to catch the train. when i was on the train back to sansai, my phone sings the song of pac-man, a sign of a new email. no. it's not from tootsie. it's from obasan. she asked the normal girl for my address. and she uses too much 絵文字(emoji: advanced emoticons; ideograph; pictograph). just like a normal obasan, her emojis feel forced, like she was trying hard to be like a normal teenage girl. i only replied her once. that's all. tootsie on the other hand is quite good at writing emails. and the normal girl writes to me like it's an official letter.

all in all, it was a time and energy consuming event that i don't want to participate in anymore, at least for now. i guess i'll sign off right now. i got some cleaning to do and i'm still not finished stuffing up my travel bag with stuff; because i'm going back to malaysia tomorrow afternoon yeah !!! i want to eat meat !!! hot red meat !!! i want to kill those delicious animals and eat them like a fucking cannibal hwahwhawhahahhhaa !!!

about the oath ceremony

ok. i DID the sports oath ceremony this morning. it's done. well.... it went quite smoothly i guess because magically i was able to produce a lot of laughter from the kids and they even clapped their hands and cheered even louder than after the 校長 (headmaster) 's morning greeting. i did the oath ceremony using malay, japanese, english and kelantanese all mixed up real good like a cup of starbuck's milk shake. i guess i have failed to make a fool out of myself! yay !

with that done, i have another task to complete before tomorrow morning. i have to practice dancing to japanese pop-idol group: morning musume's renai revolution 21 (モーニング娘。の恋愛レボリューション２１) hit song. the whole class ( all male and that includes me ) are going to perform this dance during tomorrow's night stage show; but damn the dance steps are soo hard ! this is the video that i've been dancing to for the past 2 days, trying to remember it all. i have no idea how my friends could dance perfectly to this crap.

the main reason why i'm trying hard to be able to do the dance is because the whole class had agreed ( those crazy fuck-heads ) that those who can't dance are going to be performing a ' lotion-sumo ' show just after the dance is over as a part of the our show for the night. maybe you're wondering what is a lotion-sumo; it's really simple actually. it's the same thing as the real sumo, except you put a lot of lotion and vegetable oil on the ring to make the floor slippery. fuck no i'm not going to participate in that crap; let me do the stupid girly dance please !!!

i, first and foremost, knew perfectly well that i can't dance for a nickel but it's way better that doing the crazy 'lotion-sumo'. that's total humiliation and a disgrace to the human species. yeah i guess you can say that my japanese friends are quite crazy, sometimes. but after actually tried doing the complicated dance steps, now i know how hard it is for the morning musume girls to dance and sing at the same time. what a feat. ok i guess i should go back to watching 4 under aged japanese girls dance like freaking monkeys on crack and try to mimic their girly dance steps. oh i'm so proud of myself.